I never thought this would happen, but I actually ran on the treadmill. I did. I did it yesterday for 7 minutes and today for 11. Suddenly I wasn't so worried about the gym, its dust, and its serious need for a roof repair (hello pails set up by the bathroom to catch the roof water).
Let me start here: I was feeling super down about my lack of weight loss for the past 8 weeks. Yes, 8 weeks people! I went to get a fill for my lapband on Wednesday and my weight hasn't changed. I pretty much got into bed on Wed. night at 7:30 or so. Yes, Wed. was my 14th anniversary. I would have felt bad for my hubby, but we did a quick overnighter on Tues night so we had already celebrated. Anyway, I was in bed on Wed. by 7:30 and just laid there feeling sorry for myself. Then on Thursday morning I had to talk myself into getting up and going to the gym. I finally rolled out of bed, with a crappy attitude, and got to the gym.
I was walking along on a treadmill I had not tried before and started listening to my workout playlist. Okay, there are some crazy songs on there...like Rehab by Amy Winehouse. That is actually song #1. I started likening the song to me. Of course I don't need rehab for drugs or alcohol....but I need one for my body. Then here comes Carrie Underwood (do you think Amy and Carrie are friends in real life? Do you think I picked these songs because the girls names are the names of my sisters? Interesting.) So Carrie is singing "Before He Cheats," how she took a Louisville Slugger to some guys headlights, carved her name into the leather, slashed a hole in all four tires....etc. So, I start visualizing my fat (sorry if I'm too descriptive) and I start taking a big ole baseball bat to that sucker and the more I listen and walk, the more powerful I feel.
Then I think, Hey, I just saw some super, duper fatties on The Biggest Loser actually RUNNING on treadmills, not walking. So I think, I'll try it.
I wait patiently for the guy next to me to get off the treadmill because there is no way I'm going to embarass myself and start running with someone SO CLOSE. I wait until he is gone. At this point I have 8 minutes left. I punch the speed up and start running. And I run until I have 30 seconds left and punch it down and "cool down" for 30 seconds.
I could not believe it. My entire life I've told myself that it would take an act of God to get me to EVER run. I didn't believe I was capable. But those Big Losers inspired me...and I did it.
Then today, I repeated it. It wasn't a fluke. I actually upped my running by 50% and ran an entire 11 minutes.
I feel empowered. I feel blessed.